Spring Morning Sprung

Morning pooples, it’s gorgeous here. It’s really a perfect day. The only thing that could make this day better is if I wasn’t wicked sick with the Sloth Floo. It’s totally gross, I coughed so hard on the bus this morning that my lung popped right out and hit a little German girl in the eye. Her mom was pretty gracious about it, but still, ew. Since I’ve been laid up in bed for a few days now I have lots of work to catch up on and no time for the post I want to write about celebrities with melting faces, so you get weedio of Penny waking up on this lovely spring day. Later!

Hot or Not: Mena Suvari

In this inaugural edition of Slothville’s Hot or Not feature, we take a look at quirky quirkster Mena Suvari. Heralded as an American beauty since “American Beauty,” I’ve always found something *off* about her. First of all, there’s the forehead:

The hell? How big IS her brain, anyway? Girl had BETTER be in MENSA. But a big forehead can be sexy, yes? It’s a matter of perspective. It’s kind of hot because it’s unique. So…………….ok, forehead is working. It’s what she does to cover up that forehead that has me confused.

GAH!! NOT GOOD. I think Ricky Martin wrote “She Bangs” about Mena Suvari.

So then Mena went and shaved her head which was both EXTREMELY HOT:

And EXTREMELY NOT:

I asked Penny what she thought about all this and she was like, “Dude, lay off, she’s my cousin.”

I can definitely see the resemblance.

But in general I was impressed by how well Mena rocked the bald. She didn’t go for a wig or a nasty-ass weave (ahem) and for the most part she remained solidly in the Hot category.

Um…………YUM.

The Verdict: HOT.

Was there ever any doubt?

Later cats! (And thanks to Sarah for today’s post idea.)

Penny Fix!

Sorry to ignore lately, I’ve been frittering away all my time on Facebook. Fucking FACEBOOK because they have Scrabulous and Scramble - shit is crack cocaine.

Here you are - a quick Penny fix. She fixes everything. This works like a flipbook, ready?

Penny’s Bedroom Adventures! Ooh la la!

5 pages:

3 Pages:

And 3 last pages!

Later Cats!

Penny Pie

It’s been a few days - here’s your Penny fix!

Spotlight on Us

The week is winding down, YAY! We are SO ready for the weekend…

Oh, Oscar Love.

Ok, how about them Oscars? I’ve been reading a lot of complaints about how long they were and how there were a billion montages. But…….I liked the montages and I was surprised how early the show ended! AM I LIVING IN AN ALTERNATE REALITY?? *cue “Lost” music*

Anyway, I’m feeling syoooper romantic about the couple from “Once” winning for the song. It’s an amazing song and they are flat out awesome. They fell in love for real! The real life love story is even better than the fiction - how often often does that happen???

We can all thank super-creepy Cillian Murphy for being an insecure wanker and pulling out of the movie, causing them to lose their star and all of their funding and ONLY MAKING THE WHOLE THING THAT MUCH MORE ROMANTIC WHEN IT ALL WORKED OUT IN THEN END.

Wee! Thanks for being a dick, Cillian! Glen Hansard is only a million times hotter than you in every way, anyway.

And of course, no Monday would be complete without a little Penny-in-the-morning action. Enjoy.

Reunion! *Now with important updates*

Tomorrow night I am going to meet Penny’s first foster mom, Sarah. We have spoken on the phone and by email a lot, but Penny was with another lady, Gladys, when I actually picked her up from her Waggytail foster home on the Lower East Side…almost a year ago now!

Sarah is bringing her dog Roo over to play as well. Roo has no front paws but a whole lotta spunk. Chihuahua play time!

In other, not so good news, it looks as though “Where the Wild Things Are” is being sunk, possibly because it’s ……..too cool? Let’s hope Spike Jonze wins the day on this one… I told Penny about it and she was all,

“Meh. Typical.”

And just for fun, here’s a picture of Katie Jones lugging around a giant hot water bottle for her arthritis, poor dear. Aging is never easy, is it?

Aww.

CREEPY UPDATE: A few minutes ago someone found Slothville by googling “whispering bob saget during sex.” Ungh! Nuh!

TOTALLY RAD UPDATE: We’re on CityRag, yo! WOOOOOOOO!!!

Ok, we voted!

Civic duty and all that… It seems that most people I know are voting for Obama, but I went the other way. I like Hillary. I’ve always liked her. And if anyone can wrangle the big beast of bureaucracy and OWN that shit, it’s the H-bomb. Good luck to everyone! Um….except the Republicans, fuck those guys.

Death by Cute

Get ready! 1…2…3…

BAM!

Aw, look at you, all bloody and lying on the floor. Don’t say I didn’t warn you - I mean, I counted to three. But it seems you are still breathing….

KARATE CHOP!

TIGER CLAW!!

PALM OF SHAOLIN!!!

And if that didn’t finish you off, congratulations. You’re the Highlander.

Gud Morning! Oh, screw this.

This is Penny’s reaction to the bucketing rain and the thunder and lightning that were ripping through our atmosphere at 8 o’clock this morning.

I got her dressed in her sweater and raincoat only to have her plant her feet and refuse to walk. I suppose I could have dragged her by the neck all the way to the bus stop, but she would have been filthy by the time we got there. Also dead, I would imagine. So I carried my shivering chihuahua to work in my arms today and now she’s sleeping in her carrier as cozy as can be.

Our bonus footage today is of Penny enjoying her Christmas present.

Yes, it’s a pig’s ear. This was the least nauseating video I took of her eating it. Fun!

In other news, I’ve decided to go for my master’s in journalism at Harvard. Also fun! I’ll have more on that later. Have a lovely weekend, cats, and stay dry!