Slow Adventures in Slothville

January 12, 2007

Shameful Shoe Number 8 Bajeelion Meelion

Filed under: Shoes — shhville @ 4:02 pm

There’s a lot I could say about this shoe.

Like, how there is no padding in the footbed and I can guarantee that the sole has no give so the whole thing just flops off the back of your foot when you walk, like you stepped on a giant piece of beef jerky and now you can’t get it off so it’s just flapping around, spanking your heels while you walk, attracting dogs and raccoons and shit. But what I really want to say is that as soon as I looked at this shoe I thought of this:

Which, incidentally, goes here:

And you know……I do appreciate my cervix.

Keeps the babies in, lets the babies out (in theory). Gets bruised once in a while. Prefers pads to tampons (we have agreed to disagree on this). Basically, we’re pretty close. So, if my cervix told me that it wanted to wear a little hat with a big fuckin piece of beef jerky hanging off it and to watch out for raccoons, I regret to say that our friendship would be seriously tested.

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10 Comments »

  1. Well, thanks for taking care of today’s quota of cervix images.

    Comment by The Retropolitan — January 12, 2007 @ 4:34 pm

  2. I’m glad you showed the 2nd pic. I really had no idea what it was from the first one.

    I thought it was the lip of a bong.

    Comment by Pup — January 12, 2007 @ 4:48 pm

  3. I thought it was a gummy treat of some sort, so that if you got hungry, you had a handy snack. Of course it would come with a pack of 5 and different flavors and colors.

    Comment by Seth — January 12, 2007 @ 5:37 pm

  4. Mmmmmmm……….cervical……..

    Comment by shhville — January 12, 2007 @ 5:41 pm

  5. What will they think of next? Condoms on shoes? Oh, wait, TLC did that already.

    Comment by Vince — January 12, 2007 @ 5:42 pm

  6. What the hell is the spooge on the diaphragm in the second picture?

    And what is that seemingly empty area between the uterus and the bladder in the third picture? Is that just room to grow or what? (Yeah, I got high marks in anatomy…why do you ask?)

    Comment by Julie — January 13, 2007 @ 4:27 am

  7. It’s a change purse, duh.

    Comment by shhville — January 14, 2007 @ 4:08 am

  8. So…we get a shameful “purse” post next?

    Comment by Seamus — January 15, 2007 @ 6:09 pm

  9. Yes! Purses!

    Comment by Tot — January 16, 2007 @ 5:49 am

  10. Oooooooh!! That’s a GREAT idea!! I’m on it.

    Comment by shhville — January 16, 2007 @ 8:55 pm


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