This week, Thursday is the worst day, temporarily taking the title from long-time heavyweight champion Tuesday, which is likely to reclaim its title next week in order to avoid reality being turned on its head.
I’ve been out sick the past two days and I KNOW what you’re thinking. “If you’ve been home with free time on your hands, why does your blog still look like a wind-blown icy tundra instead of the lush, diverse jungle that is your native habitat?” The answer to this rather impertinent question that have ascribed to you is just this: I AM A SLOTH.
When sloths are sick at home with nothing pressing to do, they follow a very strict schedule:
1. Wake up at 1 in the afternoon.
2. Make eggs.
3. Take a valium (optional).
4. Watch a movie (may substitute with book if movie unavailable).
5. Take nap.
6. Wake up and crack a bottle of something.
7. Watch a movie (may substitute with “Law & Order re-runs if movie unavailable).
8. Order take-out.
9. Mud mask (optional).
So, as you can see, I really had no time for blog-wrangling. Fortunately, Warrior Steve has figured out how to put pictures in my sidebar so you will be seeing more biodiversity soon. If your link isn’t up yet, don’t worry, I was re-naming everyone and I got bored and “Goonies” was on tv, so half of you aren’t up yet.
Oh, I almost forgot – today is SO BAD because one of my co-workers is on vacation and I’m supposed to be doing his work as well as mine, but instead I ate eggs and slept for two days so when I got here this morning the pile of work sitting on my desk, chuckling and fluttering its evil fingers at me was (is) the size of Finland. So off I go to negate everything that makes me who I am and be a good worker sloth.